So I guess I just need to vent because its how Im feeling! I could vent to someone but they just wont get it.....its not possible to explain how I feel.
You have no idea what an ass you are. You have no idea how selfish and clueless you are. You have no idea what a friend actually is and when you asked me for respect, I should have asked you if you know what the word means!!!
I seem to give and give and it just gets taken and then some how I feel like my heart gets ripped out of my chest. Im not talking about love....Im talking about when you give time and feelings and patience and understand and you think its appreciated but in actual fact its not and there was never ever a teeny tiny bit of appreciation. You never actually gave a hoot and just drained out as much goodness to make you feel good. To make yourself feel special and wanted and to give yourself a boost. I was only ever there for you to feel wanted and that you are worth something.
But the truth is, you are nothing. You have no concept of other people's feelings. You dont know to treat people around you as people unless you want something from them. You give just so that you can take it all and then toss the unwanted material away.
I have a feelings. I am a person with a warm heart and I deserved better! I took all the bad you gave and instead of listening to my friends......real friends, I stood up for you because I believed that deep down inside you were a good person. You were someone who just needed a bit of understanding and time and that the things you said were actually true.....I should have listened to my inner feelings and known that you were exactly as people had warned me about you.
What's sad is that you are going to do exactly the same to the new person. How do I know this because I can see it happening in exactly the same order and way you did it with me. So stupid....I was so stupid to believe there was something decent inside you.
I want to wish bad on you! I want to wish that one day it happens the other way round and that you feel the way you making me feel but I dont......I really hope you never feel the way you have made me feel....I hope that you never have to feel used and abused and broken because you thought the respect, trust and honesty was a two way thing.
You need to understand what words mean before you ask for them from someone!!
Friend -a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.Honesty -truthfulness, sincerity, or frankness.
Respect - esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability
Trust -reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.
- confident expectation of something; hope.
